Jason Chua

Nerds.We've all heard abt em,hate em, love em, they just cant stop to put a smile on my face.Often stereotyped as the ones who pursues higher intellectual and anti social.The stereotypical nerd is intelligent but socially and physically awkward.There are more nerds in miri then you think.Open your eyes wide enough and you will realised that 2/10 people you see walking around are in fact NERDS.
Theres a few type of nerds.Pervy nerds,faggot nerds,hot nerds,bitchy nerds,rich nerds,and stupid nerds.

Pause

?!?!??!!? stupid nerds X0X0

Yeah there are some nerds out there are in fact stupid.Lawl.Some nerds show a pronounced interest in subjects which other tend to find dull and complex hard and difficult to comprehend.On the opposite spectrum , nerds may share common interest with their nerd friends ; playing cards,comic books,collecting sci fi action figurin and is viewed as immature.Nerds are often potrayed as unfit and either obese or ridicoulously thin and pale(girl readers note that they dont look like edward cullen,not even close)

We often look down on nerds , but heck they are the backbone of the country . Ask yourself how many nerdy friends do u have ? Do you see yourself having a brighther future than them? No! But seriously look at Bill Gates , everyone was in dos mode before he introduce Windows. (why windows nt why not doors).Another example ,just look at steve jobs,the touchscreen thingy u use to call your friends ,that small lil juke box u beg and cry for .yeah u noe wat i mean ,iphone,steve jobs made it for u.See if you ever look down on nerds again or discriminate against them, throw your iphone and smash your computer. So after reading this post i hope u all out there could show em some love ,give em a hug , give em a blow... ok thats enough
Leave me a comment or 2 cause they will carve a smile on my face =)

p.s ( im not a nerd but ill slap one if i see one winks*)

Due to recession, I sacked my Girlfriend (part of my cost cutting efforts) I need new one, so pass on this information to your female friends...please this is urgent (females only)

Applications are invited for the following post. The package and incentives are mentioned below:

Designation : Junior girl friend (trainee)
Experience : Must have ditched at least 2 guys (Fresher with excellent credentials will be considered)
Other requirement : Should have the Potential to do street bargaining and fight if required..
Age:18-23 (if the individual is too good looking but not in the age group can also apply, special consideration will be undertaken for them)
Height, weight, complexions no bar, but is subjective.
Perks and incentives:
Total gross ( Monthly ) :
• 2 gifts worth not exceeding rm 1000/-(no precious metals, stones)
• bike rides each duration 1 hour
• trips to Lambir National Park
• 5 Trips to City fan / Bulatan park
. Desserts at a regular gap of 3 days
• Daily Provision of Samosa/Bread Pakoda/Bhel worth rm10 /-
• 2 movies per month (on weekends)
• Visits to Bintang Shopping Mall and Boulevard every weekend (On your own expense)
APair of Jeans or T-shirts according to demand will be gifted, subjectto finance availability and to the size available with the shopkeeper.
Net Deductions (Monthly): Affair Fund and un-professional taxes will be informed on joining
The probation period is 6 months, after which confirmation (will be Promoted to fulltime Girlfriend)


Please NOTE:
1. Only females.
2. Girls who left in the last 2 months need not apply.
3. Ex-girlfriends will be eligible only if they agree to the above mentioned conditions.

There is more:
For girls who are not eligible, can take advantage of the referral program by referring their friends, colleagues etc.
Candle light or Tube light dinner will be given on every referral, even if candidate is not selected.
Search never ends!!

Interested candidates can send their resume with
Subject:

Name/fresher- exp/age.

Photo must be in attachment to the email address via mail

Note: Applications without photo will be rejected.

Ah bengs are as i said in the other post is the male counterpart of Ah lians.And its also a stereotype to chinese males in their late 20s and can only be found in south east asia ( malaysia and singapore).Ah bengs are often related to crimes,overly dyed hair (over and over again and over again), and funky fashion only god knows what their thinking.Nyways move on to the main point.

Ah bengs can often be found in shopping mall holding their countepart ah lians hand bag on the left and a ciggarette on the right.Like ah lians they also like to take self potrait pictures and post it up on either friendster or facebook etc etc you got the point.Unlike normal everage joe, their overly "zhenged" car cant even speedbumps because its too low.They indulge in outdated japanese fashion and is not shy to show.

Ah bengs have a very distinctive slang.If you walk around in the mall and suddenly you hear a loud voice from the back you can bet your money on an AH beng speaking on the phone.Its a very easy way to pick up.They would mix english and mandarin (or other related chinese langguage) and often vulgarities in their daily speech.Ah Bengs are normally found gathering in the busier and more developed cities in the region. Ah Bengs normally comes from Chinese villages or Chinese dominated communities in cities. Ah Bengs typically come from lower class or middle class families.

Ah Bengs' fashion come in several stereotypes. One stereotype perceives Ah Bengs wearing flamboyant shirts, for example, with colorful decorations especially dragons, tight jeans and always carrying plastic combs. Another stereotype perceives Ah Bengs trying to follow Japanese fashion, with spiked and dyed hair, metallic ornaments, leather jackets, belts and pants.Luckily i am not into any of those shits.

If you are a girl and you see anyone or any guy that matches all of the above in boulevard or bintang mall stay away from him because who knows he might come out to you and say ''my friend wants your number '' LOL

I was browsing throught the net and i stumbled across AAL blog. Basicly its about ah lians.Its critics on ah lians. Judging from the langguage and slang i could think of none other than singaporeans and assuming they are still teenagers or college students.Im actually baffled the fact that they got the time in the world to actually pick up the flaws of ah lians and blog about it.But anyway lets get going with the main point.



Ah lians, definition of ah lians, hmm let me see... if you look around

1.polite

2.decently dressed

3.single

4.smart

5.well versed



Above are things that you will NOT find in ah lians. Its funny how they like to squeeze alot of alphabets into a word and twit it around.

qqqoinnggggg , yyews,mmmeaiiisss,trsuut, qqort, fiqurrinqqq

just to name a few twisted words , care to dechiper wat they mean?

going , you me , trust ,got , figuring <<<>



Ah lians are stereotyped as anti-intelectuall superficial, materialistic, and shallow.

Ah Lians are commonly stereotyped as having hair dyed in gaudy and bright colours, and wearing fashion mimicking hip-hop culture, or outdated Japanese fashion, although how much of this is true is debatable. Most Ah Lians wear fashions that are outdated and have straightened hair, usually with thick fringes. They love to take self- portraits and imitate the way Japanese girls take their pictures, making their eyes look big and puffing out their cheeks. They also take pictures by putting a horizontal 'Peace sign' over their eyes, pressing a fist facing outwards against their puffed cheek. They also apply a very sharp tone in their speech which they classify as "cute". Another distinct feature of an Ah Lian is they swear in most of their conversations just like Ah Bengs. Much like their male counterparts - that is-, ah bengs .Ah Lians are also thought of as being excessively flashy and show-offs.

The Ah Lian "culture" is especially prevalent in the secular Chinese educational system schools, typified by their frequent appearance in cliques with (their male counter parts ah bengs.)

Ah Lians commonly speak a kind of hybrid mix of singlish or manglish and Chinese, or Chinese-related dialects. It is also common for the grammar from these dialects to cross over to English usage, creating English phrases with Chinese grammar.

Ah Lians are stereotyped as very loose, sleeping with anyone of any race, age, and social status.

When people say gay...it pisses me off not because im gay..when people say ''thats so gay''.Its not like the word ''gay'' is an adjective. Ok when you saw a faggot in the class room, what pops out in your mind first?? Thats right , thats exactly what your thinking '' my god is he gay?'' well that happens to me once. I know i sound hypocritical now but heck who doesnt ? But you know what i hate most? People actually say;s that they love gay ppl. Isnt that a lil bit too contradicting because they use the word ''GAy'' everytime .When you speak of something negative , you are sending a negative connotation i mean like let me give you an example

straight : you know wat i like gay people, that make me feel comfortable around them because i don feel like they are staring at my boobs all the time

gay : do you want me to stare at your boobs?

straight : ewww thats so gay!

People need to acknowledge the fact that gay people isnt born to be gay. They choose their sexual orientation that suit them the best.Ok let us just say that everyone on earth is homosexual, and just imagine if they saw straight people.'' OMG THATS SO STRAIGHT" You get wat i mean.Wouldnt that be a lil bit weird. Ok this is getting a lil bit awkward . Why am i blogging about gay ppl ? am i turning gay? wtf haha relax i aint turning gay because i just turned single i still love pinkies HAHAHA Fuck you guys and i love you .. omg i sounded so gay ( maybe i am ) ok fuck it im out

You are the one who said it was impossible
You are the one who never feel what i feel
All the things you said
All the things you do
You made me feel like i lost my soul
You are one who nodded
Words are mere words
But its you are the one who said the feeling is gone
Thats the deal breaker for me
We couldnt be together anymore now that we cant even communicate
I never hated you
But now i loath you
Because you made me feel utterly dejected

When i listen to the songs you sent me,when i remember how we used to belong to each other,when we share the same cup,when we share the same commitment,the same love.
I've always been the best ears,and you have always been the best companion.You are like the ice-cream and im the cone.But till that day,everything is gone, and i realised i've made a mistake.Timberland says it best, its too late to apologize. Your ice cream melted and my cone wilted.For the first day i couldnt fathom wat had just happen.Every word you've said,it made my heart shattered to a million pieces that i could go through a needle head.Thats when i realised i loved you. Thanks to you im a changed man, i will appreciate whoever next. thanks for the memories even it wasnt so great. Bend me to hard and i will break. You pushed me to the verge of breaking point.And you broke it.........

i am now broken because of you..

1.Today, I broke up with the girl I'd been dating for two months because she started smoking. This is a deal breaker for me. I just found out from her friend that she started smoking for the sole purpose of getting me to break it off and now plans to quit. FML

2.Today, trying to be sexy I was sucking on my boyfriends fingers. I was really starting to turn him on, when I noticed something crunchy in my mouth. Turns out, he went digging for treasure up his nose earlier. I found the treasure in my mouth. FML

3.Today I saw a girl I haven't seen in 4 years. She used to like me back then. Since then I have lost 50 pounds, and never had the confidence to ask her out. She said I looked really sexy so I decided to ask her out on a date then and there. She said no, she only likes fat guys. FML

4.Today, I called my girlfriend's parent to ask for her hand in marriage. They were shocked and told me that they would have to refuse. Apparently my girlfriend had told them last week that she had met someone new at work and didn't know how to break it off with me. FML

5.Today, I was talking to my mom about when I have kids. I told her I may want two or three. She immediately cut me off and told me to stick to one, and that any more than that will be a burden. I am the second born child of my family. FML

6.Today, I was babysitting a boy who was 11 years old. He told me that he loved me and wanted to be my boyfriend. I told him that I think he is a really great kid but I'm 17 so it would never work out. He said okay. When his parents came home he told them that I hit him and started crying. FML

7.Today, while giving a lecture about gasses to a large chemistry class, I went outside to let loose an unusualy loud fart while they took some notes. I came back in only to see 300 students dying of laughter. I had left the wireless mic on. FML

8.Today, my girlfriend called me and told me to come to her college, so I did. I was greeted by the campus police who told me to stop harassing her because she no longer wants to be with me. Then they told me I was no longer welcome on campus and hereby banned. She used campus police to dump me. FML

9.Today, my girlfriend reached into my pocket to get my keys so she could get something out of my car. When she yanked them out, the condom that we just used flew up into the air and landed on the floor in front of her entire family. FML

10.Today, I discovered the guy that sits next to me in class is actually a girl. Not only is that bad, but we had to write a paper about each other. I used the words "him" and "he", and read it to the whole class. FML

11.Today, I saw my boyfriend after not seeing him for 7 months. During this time I have lost a lot of weight and am proud of it. My boyfriend didn't say anything about the lost weight. When we were alone and things started to heat up, he took off my bra and said "I think your tits are smaller."

12.Today, I was visiting my girlfriend's house to meet her parents. We were having a nice conversation and her mom then asked "What have you done recently that was great?" I replied without thinking "Your daughter." FML