Jason Chua

I would like to bring to your attention that my gf application post is not really a hit on the girl, cause no one applied ,( that is not totally true ) perhaps my incentive isnt attractive enough or maybe my requirements is too specific and it scared the girls away i.e

Girl A : ooo i think i can try out to apply *continue reading* , ok never mind fuck that faggot im 55 he says he want 18-22

Girl B : hmmm i think i could give it a try *digging my blog* , forget it i only ditched one guy b4

Girl C : I got all the requirements needed =) so i think i will apply

30 mins later girl C was rejected

Girl C : Damn i know that guy ! And i dated him b4 FML T.T

Ok on this 2nd attempt to score a girl or 2 , i decided to lower down the specs of the designated future gf.I decided to even raise the incentives and be more generous with my outings with them so Mall visits at MY expenses . But don worry Now the application will have a wider range and is more open =) Good luck !


Applications are invited for the following requirement. The package and incentives are mentioned below:
Designation :
Junior , Middle age , Senior citizens ( if your husband died and you are look for a stable man)

Experience :
Not neccessary to have ditched 2 guys , I don mind freshies , I don mind Seasoned folks too

Requirement :
Must have a good sense of humour,( meaning laugh at every single joke i crack)
A pair of working eyes ,
A pair of working hands,
A pair of working legs
Must have a dedicated heart to be my full time girlfriend
At least do some homework before applying ( must noe a thing or 2 of my pass)
Its important to be well versed in english ( if you are ah lian, consider taking IELTS b4 you send in your resume)
A list of history of pass r/s ( attach it to your resume) reason for break ups
If you are recomended by others you stand a good chance to be accepted
A talent session will be conducted during the interview i.e (singing, dancing,cracking jokes,imitating disney characters voice,Poem reading ...etc etc)
Able to do street bargaining , and fights if required
IMPORTANT NOTICE: senior citizen that are handicapped or have any cronical illness are not eligible to apply .

Perks and incentives:
Total( monthly) gross of : rm 500

• 2 gifts worth not exceeding rm 1500/-(no precious metals, stones)
• bike rides each duration 3 hour( used to be 2)
• trips to Lambir National Park ( monthly routine to check out polar bears and utans) Hot*
• 5 Trips to City fan / Bulatan park ( Now fishing rods are included in this package) new*
. Desserts at a regular gap of 2.5 days ( Good behaviour will have more rewards)
• Daily allowance Not reaching RM30
• 2 movies per month (on weekends)
• Visits to Bintang Shopping Mall and Boulevard every weekend (On my own expense)
APair of Jeans or T-shirts (levis)according to demand will be gifted, subjectto finance availability and to the size available with the shopkeeper.
Net Deductions (Monthly): Affair Fund and un-professional taxes will be charge ( or worse terminated)
The probation period is 1 month, after which confirmation will be Promoted to fulltime Girlfriend
Important Notice :
The 5 finalist will be eligible to compete for the position Wife and carries the title MRs Chua


Hurry! Special offer will be given for the first 5 applicants and its on FCFS basis

p/s
pls take note , there is a strict code for the resume format , pls be inform that a proper format is required , Things like address , phone number , passport size picture , skills , experiences, guys u worked for , qualifications, certificates, failing to meet this requirements will result in rejection. Credits will be given to those who provide more than what is needed and a proper format

Email :jason_biteme@Gfsearch.com
Office number :085-433222
Fax : 085-433222
Hp : 014-768-2515

Please submit your resume before 18/11/2030

Step 1
Buy urself a pack of ferero rocher
step 2
stalk anyone that goes in the bath room to do number 2
step 3
go to the cubicle next to him
Step 4
mash up the chocolate bar in ur hand
Step 5
And u stick ur hand to the bottom side of the wall and say
'' scuse me can u pass me some toilet papper over there ''

HAHA

Today i have a few agenda to attend to
1) sit for my law test
2) open a public bank account
3) make an appointment or check my teeth right away with dr baru
*but things din go my way

I was on msn this morning and b4 i went to myEG i was chatting with crys,when i bade goodbye to her and she said this b4 i go.

jas: wish me luck alright
crystea: i hope u fail
crystea: i like to go against
jas : oh okay wish me fail den
crystea: oh ok i hope u fail jas so u can sit for it right away and i hope u fail it again

FML T.T

1st agenda
I was on my way to Myeg for my law test, on the way i was bullshitting things like , " mum i think those ppl who cant pass their law test are really fcked up '' My mum gave me an irritated face, '' boyyy u know , you are always overconfident and u like to look down on others '' blah blah blahh~~~ don u dare fail boy if u do u will be the first in the family to actually fail law.

on the side note : my mum actually pass her law and got her license but she dont know how to drive @@

I went in myEg and sat there waiting for my turn , and suddenly my ah beng jay chou message ring tone came into play. Who was it i wonder lol, it was jeremy and this is wat he has to say

jeremy : watsup man gambateh ...haha..dunt lose my face man u must pass man ...later u become like me if not passs ...got bass waiting for us hahah yamatehhh ( wtf) haaha

jason : how the heck did u noe but anyway thanks lol

jeremy : If not pass blow job the jpj guy ... hahah kasi song u punya pensil biar got song ma ... comfirm pass

jason : wtf !!

20 mins later ....

walked out the of the computer room knowing i passed.it went smoothly without a hitch.alot is actually running through my mind How am i suppose to tell this to mum , and wat catchy phrase should i say ?
People who cant pass their law is retarded?
People who cant pass their law doesnt even need to drive?
People who cant pass their law are really hopeless? hehehe stupid ppl
very mean hor *

But i am a modest guy , so i kept the thought to myself, i Got a freaking 45 TT was expecting 50 actuaally but anyway fuck it 45 would do .. i don give 2 shits anyways..

Thats agenda number 1 done

2nd agenda
is where i was suppose to open a public bank account for my freaking salary ...so i waited in line to withdraw 250 ..waited again in line for someone to attend to my bank thingy ...i waited for 40 mins just to hear '' urm sorry today our system is down so there is no way we can open up an account for u , can u come again tomoro , FML ! so i left without saying a word. I went to another PUBE BANK and luckily this time the line is short , i went in and the next in line is me. So i gave the girl my Ic and i saw the most unpleasant scene ever, she have residue of cookies on the side of her mouth and i cant bare to look at her ewww, but it was funny to see hw the residue moves when her lips move it moves with it , haha . She tried her best to scan the freaking gold chip on my ic, but to no avail, Rub , scan , rub rub , Scan FAILED..as much as i dont like to show other ppl my Ic , i also hate that i have to bring my passport as supporting evidence that the '' Vietnamese " looking guy on the ic is me . Just for kicks . And so i left once again without saying a word. so i guess i wont be able to open an account today. CIBAI THE PUBE BANK.

3rd agenda
I was suppose to meet up with a dentist, and so i went to the clinic with my mum. Its pretty rundowned actually . have u ever heard of Doctor baru? yeah my friend introduced me to him krismin.He got his teeeth fix there . And so i went in and no one is behind the counter. I peeked behind and saw 2 giggling nurse came out. I was like ermmm '
me : i want to make an appointment with the dr
nurse : ok when
me : next monday 1030 would do
nurse : write ur name down and contact number
nurse : wait wait wait hold on wat do u want the doctor to do for u?
me : i want to see if i can make braces for my teeth
both nurse : ( laughs)
me : ( wtf wats so funny abt that )
nurse : our doctor stopped the practicing braces for patients because he want to retire edi
me : wtf!!!
walked out the clinic*

I sat in the car i realised that , things that are out of my control doesnt go my way today , and yeah so i passed my law ( which is a good thing) but i failed to make my bank account and appointment with my doctor..And as much as i want to listen to engine ( wtf listen to engine sound) this saturday , i cant because according to the bitch in myEG apparently its a PUBE holiday this satuday , kaninah @@

So i went back home , after all that shiets i realised i couldnt take any steps back again. I cleaned my room and wash my clothes and realised something
I lost 4-5 of my favourite underwears fuckkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk!!!!!!
I wonder if its in my dads wardrobe , or the freaking maid stole it and bring it back to indon so she can wear it on her head while she sleeps Wtf !?!?!?!?!?!
ok enough set backs today im out

I knew i couldnt keep you
I knew we werent even meant to be
You used back the very same reason i broke up with you
Truth be told ,Im falling apart
Not because you decided to kick it with me
Its because it hurts so bad
When i reminisce the sweet memories we had
It doesnt really mean a thing to me back then
Now it meant alot to me
I did my very best but it doesnt help at all
Since you dont even care about me anymore
I will let you go gently
Now we are back to back
And we start taking 10 steps away from each other without looking back


10


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3


2


1


You turned back at me and realised i did not move at all
And i will whisper go.....

Maybe is you i couldnt live without
Maybe i am love drunk
Never know when i will be sober
But all i know is that im still hung over
You are so contagious yet addictive
Just one sip will make me sick
These feelings that i kept blocking myself from
Is giving me a carpal tunnel
It finally gave in
I couldnt hold it any much longer
Im sick and bed ridden
Perhaps we should trade shoes
Fit my shoes ,just to see whats its like to be me
What size u wear? i wear 8
Lets see if u can fit your feet

Sorry for the untimely update.Been busy the whole week working FmL.I went to a saloon today and got my new hair cut and guess what? i turn out to be what im afraid to be.I dyed my hair and shave the left side of my head and left my right side burn untouched..and i dyed it dark brown/purplish..first i was like oh ok that would SOUND nice cool innovative idea i've never tried a crazy hair cut so i thought i might give it a try,the end result of my irrational action , i looked like a complete hooligan.FML
I look like a fucking ah beng now FUCK U KELVIN SALOOON!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I think i might try out leather bell bottom pants with a comb sticking out at the back red shirt with dragon on it and a leather sling bag and top it off with my new hair cut .hehe ah beng wanabe
* cipai ni zao ta a ni wo shi pink men de!!!*